1. You Learn To Keep Your Emotions Out Of The Office
According to Pew Research women currently, make up 46.8 percent of the workforce in the United States, and the Department of Labor says women participating in the workforce have climbed from 32.7 percent in 1948 to 56.8 percent in 2016. The chances are higher for female promotion. But on the flip side, admirable achievements can lead to our female colleagues feeling excluded, or exposed to jealousy.
That’s why it’s important for us to disassociate our emotions from daily business. Did you know that feeling jealous and competing with other women has to do with the way we’re wired? The Feminine Foes: New Science Explores Female Competition explores why women and men engage in intra-sexual competition. It says “Men engage in competition with other males to gain attention and reproductive favor of females while women engage in competition for position to secure a suitable male.”
Well, Joyce Benson, a researcher at Boston College says competition among women has 3 characteristics
- To protect their bodies from harm women rely on masked aggression toward other women instead of confronting them physically
- High status and very attractive women need less help and protection from other women, thus a women who tries to distinguish or promote herself will encounter hostility.
- In extreme cases women may guard against potential competitors by means of social exclusion.
Interesting isn’t it?
This certainly doesn’t represent how all women act toward each other. But I do think it’s interesting to look how this behavior is part of our primitive nature.
Best advice: Anytime you feel the tinge of jealousy flare up set an intention to let it go.
2. You Support Other Women
In my office, a female associate was recently promoted. While another female coworker has recently debuted a web application, she’s built from scratch that will make storing data easier. I congratulated both and shared in their success! Congratulate your female coworkers when they achieve. Do this even if their project was so outstanding, it’s hard to muster the words “Good job.” That makes you a team player and a real winner.
“We strengthen within ourselves the very thing we strengthen within others” Success is For You, David R. Hawkins
3. You Maintain Your Integrity and Peace of Mind
Integrity. It’s difficult to maintain but easy to lose, much like trust. It’s so important to me that during my morning meditation I set an intention to preserve my integrity each day. You won’t disturb your peace of mind when your integrity is intact. You won’t rehash old memories and feel their haunting guilt.
We are all doing our best to navigate through life. Sometimes when we’re older, we can be critical of our past actions. That’s why practicing the Golden Rule and living integrously lower chances of future regret.
4. You Avoid Jabbing Someone Else to Make Yourself Look Better
Why do I mention this? One thing I’ve observed in business is men, and women get the upper hand in social situations by making another person look like a fool. Cutting them off mid-sentence or unfairly injecting a rude opinion about what they just said. It perplexes me! I’ve watched and been subject to this treatment. Is this the way to conduct business? My motto is to treat everyone with integrity, compassion, and kindness and balance it out with assertiveness. Avoid dishing out little digs to dominate others. It’s not worth it because you will make enemies and ruin someone else’s day!
5. You Leave Insecurity and Paranoia In The Dust
I recently spoke with someone who told me that women in business are insecure and paranoid. I knew what she meant. I observe the type of reaction I have when a new girl is hired at work and says she’s doing great and it’s only been two weeks. Like I mentioned before it’s biological. But I let it go immediately and congratulate her on a job well done.
Paranoia and insecurity arrive when we feel like someone will take our spot. We can re-secure ourselves by quietly reminding ourselves there’s a spot on the team for everyone. It may seem silly, but it reminds you not to compete with others.
Digging Deeper Into Insecurity
Why get insecure in the first place? Well, apart from biological reasons there’s also this quote from the book Letting Go does an excellent job explaining the why behind this feeling.
“It’s not simply that we see the other person’s achievement and feel envy. Rather, the other person’s achievement triggers in us a feeling of lack or inadequacy. The feeling that we aren’t achieving what we should.
[For example in the movie Chariot’s of Fire] one of the runners looks to see where his opponent is in the race. Once he took his eye off the finish line to compare himself to another runner, he lost the second he needed to win the race.”
Action: Let’s practice living with integrity in the workplace and support our fellow sisters.
What are some ways you support women in the office?