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What does it take to be a great female leader? One that is respected and admired? I’m exploring the traits that effective leaders have and the ones they don’t.
Raise your hand if you’ve had a negative experience with a female in a senior position?
Did it ever feel like they used their position to be a little cruel to you?
Maybe their brutal remarks and actions weren’t even personal but just because they were having a bad day.
I’ve experienced this kind of situation more than once, have you?
It can be frustrating when someone who is being groomed for or is already in a senior position is deliberately not helpful or disrespectful to another woman.
Women are on the rise for sure, but we’ve still got work to do on ourselves and how we view each other as a majority.
Just know if you have a female boss that is rude to you, it may not even be personal. Of course on the one hand, if you rival her it could be personal. But that’s not the point.
Have you ever heard of David R. Hawkins? Of course, you have, if you’ve read this blog before you know that I mention him a lot.
He developed the scale of consciousness, which I am a firm believer of. The map of consciousness says that every living thing emits energy. You can quantify this energy from 1-1,000. 1,000 being the level of enlightened sages we
know such as Buddha, Jesus, Krishna. While 1 is the lowest, most negative beings/ things.
At level 200 is where a critical change takes place. We make the jump from non-integrity to integrity. And it is all up from there, my friends. Below level 200 we are essentially energy drainers, and above 200 we support all of life.
We have to remember that even though we practice an advanced mindset of love, empowerment, and respect for other women. There are still some who have not yet woken up to, or perhaps their brains are not wired the same way ours are.
It is helpful to keep the map of consciousness in mind and understand that everyone’s consciousness is not at the same place.
Make sure to have compassion for them which is easier said than done.
It is also helpful to keep in mind that some people bond in emotionally unhealthy ways and perhaps get an adrenaline hit off of acting negatively towards another.
If you’re a positive person it can be rough to ride out the wave of negativity.
Without further adieu – here are traits that I expect to see (and not to see) in a Female Manager, VP or CEO
1. Uplifting Message
You know as well as I do that there are barriers in the corporate world. It’s been a man’s world for so long that when us ladies are put in positions of power, we want to do a good job!
However, we end of putting too much of the focus on ourselves.
We want to make decisions that flex our authority. If we are questioned ( which naturally happens when you’re a manager), we can get a little defensive.
We may think in our minds “oh that person who asked the question is beneath me because I am the manager and they are who I’m managing.”
Long story short: we get insecure. Maybe a little paranoid that we’re losing ground over our team.
I’ve seen it time after time. I’ve been there myself.
However, a respectable manager is one that seeks out a win/win scenario for everyone. They operate from a place of “we” and “us.”
A manager or VP that I want to work for is not overly focused on themselves and their ranking. But who is open to different ideas and thoughts and lets people express them!
Which brings me to my next point of…….
2. Communication Style
It’s not only important what you say, (you know the rest don’t you, Empowered Lady? 😉 drumroll, please…. But how you say it!
I expect a manager, VP or CEO to have an understanding but authoritative when necessary approach.
It’s all about balance.
And a manager has to lay down the law sometimes to show they are in charge. However, I don’t want to see authority figures ruthlessly cut down fellow female employees with their words.
Our ideal authority figure will lift people up emotionally. Make them feel their ideas mean something. Their skills worth investing in.
They can accomplish this by really listening to their people.
Active Listening is a powerful skill. Your team’s loyalty and respect will be with the leader who makes them feel respected, heard and understood. You don’t want to be the type who just barks out orders!
3. Avoids Politics and Immature Games
There is nothing more frustrating than feeling like your more mature than your manager or authority figure. Is there?
I don’t want to see my manager engaging in gossip or cliquish behavior. Being a manager or CEO is about doing what’s best for the company. Recognize and utilize each’s unique strengths. It’s not about the “circle of power” or office politics. This is something we have to move past in our society.
In doing additional research for this post I came across The Atlantic article, “Why Do Women Bully Each Other at Work?” It’s fascinating to see that more women would rather have a male boss than a female!
4. Avoids Making Fun of People
Something that I didn’t realize until I saw with my own eyes multiple times… managers were making fun of their teams. This stems from lack of compassion and empathy.
If it is clear that a team member is struggling, then I do not want to see a manager pick on their weakness in front of others.
This leads me to another point. I try to be very conscious of laughing at people. Have you been in a situation where a manager makes a joke at an employee’s expense the rest of the team laughs? It’s almost an automatic response. I try to be mindful of that now and not do it. Being laughed at hurts.
It cant be said enough that integrity and trust are essential for a leader. When these two things are present the relationship between the authority figure and employee is naturally strong. You work harder for that person because you care about them and know they care about you.
There you have it, Ladies! From my observations, these traits and lack of the more negative ones make a great leader.
Call To Action: Try to observe when you feel threatened at work. If you are a manager or in a position of power is it when someone asks a question that threatens you? When have you felt yourself grasping at straws to make a decision just to seem powerful instead of thinking through the scenario and making the right decision? Allow yourself to be honest and don’t be too hard on yourself or feel guilty! No one is immune to this feeling.