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The seed for Taupe Shoes was planted before I was aware of it.
At the time I was a naive college girl, blissfully living in a bubble.
It was my senior year, and I became the odd girl out in my group of girlfriends. While I was iced out of social events and tolerated typical mean girl behavior, I also realized that I was graduating college and I didn’t have the connections or safety net most of my friends had.
What a wake-up call.
Graduating college dumped me onto the ground floor of life. I had to hustle to land my first job at a bank, and I was shocked that it wasn’t even in the corner office.
As life continued to test me, I manifested acne on my face and back. Not a couple pimples but serious, deep-rooted acne. I could barely maintain eye contact when I spoke to anyone. (Accutane eventually cured me)
Will I Ever Laugh Again?
I remember being so, so sad and wondering who I was and when the old me would come back. One day I was sitting on the couch wine in hand, watching The Sex and the City movie. It was after Big left Carrie at the altar and she was on her honeymoon with her friends. Carrie asks Miranda, “Will I ever laugh again?” And Miranda says “Yes, when something is really, really, funny.”
Change Is Coming.
Fast-forward to two years later and I’m on a plane to start a life in Seattle.
I’ve faced a lot more hurdles since moving here. But I’m resilient, and these tests have uncovered rock-solid hidden strength. The strength that I know is mine and won’t ever go away. It gives me confidence. There have been many days where I don’t feel strong at all. The point of sharing my story is to let you know that many other women have days, weeks or years where they feel less than they should; depressed even. To those women know that you’re doing a great job.