Are you upset that you haven’t found Mr. Right? Or, maybe you have your eye on someone but you’re unsure if you’re just settling….
Love and romance have been a topic on my mind lately, too. And I’ve seen so many women who approach a certain age jump into relationships as an insurance policy.
I, too, felt the need to settle down. I’m 28 for Christ sake.
“Where’s my guy?!” I used to think.
After clinging on to two guys (in my mind) and letting our love story unfold in my head – I spoke with my advisor, Scarlet to get the 411 on our potential.
However, I learned something devastating – our life paths were not intertwined.
Up until that point, I didn’t think much of life paths.
I mean who says I can’t shape my own destiny?!
But, Scarlet explained that sometimes no matter how much you want a situation to work out – or no matter how much you want this guy to be the one – sometimes destiny has other plans.
Sometimes destiny has other plans.
The guy I was so infatuated with was a pilot at my day job.
And, I could just see our future, flying to romantic destinations – picnic lunches by the sea.
But when Scarlet said, “sometimes free will can help you out, other times destiny is set.” It was a hard punch in the gut. And just like a balloon that lost all its air, my fantasy had been deflated.
But, you know what? It’s actually for the best. When I thought that guy might be the one,
I was willing to put my ambitions to the back-burner. Even though my career is something I desperately want.
I learned a big lesson that day. I learned that my career and success are important to me. And, I’m not willing to compromise that. Love is secondary for me right now.
Inner strength training tip #15: Put yourself first. It may be hard, sometimes. It might be lonely sometimes. And it might even be painful. But, for those of us that have to wait for our mate, it is worth it.
And it’s for the best. If you’re single know that you aren’t alone. In fact, there is an army of strong women who also had to wait for their guy. What did they do in the meantime? They built themselves a successful career, a successful life.
Let me introduce these women to you. They are:
1. Lilly Ghalichi
Occupation: Entrepreneur, Lilly Lashes
In her YouTube video, “how I met my husband – the secret to finding love – how he proposed”
Lilly Ghalichi gives hopeful advice to those of us that have yet to meet their better half.
She understands how pressure can be an issue and that women’s hormones scream for them to marry.
“Single for a really long time. Went through some good relationships. Some bad relationships and got to a point where I felt like, ‘Am I ever going to meet the one?'”
Just to state the facts, Lilly is now 34, married and expecting her first child with Entrepreneur husband Dara Mir. She didn’t meet him until she was 32!
The two have quite a cute love story, which I recommend catching here. But, overall Lilly focused on building her own brand, Lilly Lashes.
What was the turning point for her? Lilly credits manifesting what she wanted into the universe. She said when she was 32 and celebrating in Dubai, she turned to her friend and said,
“This is the year that I find my guy.”
On the plane ride home, she made a list of all the qualities he would have.
2. Giuliana Rancic
Occupation: Entrepreneur, TV host
Guiliana, everybody’s favorite E! News host married her lovely husband and The Apprentice winner Bill Rancic when she was 32 or 33.
They met in 2006, and Guiliana stated she “wasn’t one of those girls who was all over him.” Stating that Bill liked that about her.
Guiliana also mentioned she felt a certain way around Bill that she had never felt before.
“I never trusted anyone before I met Bill, I thought how could you marry someone for the rest of your life, what if they betray you?”
She also shared that Bill and her share the same morals. Which makes their marriage work perfectly!
Prior to her marriage, Guiliana built up her career has the go-to host on E! News. By the time she met Bill, she was fully established on her own and strong.
3. Amal Clooney
Occupation: International Human Rights Lawyer
Three words when we think of Amal Clooney. Beautiful, elegant, and very smart. Wait, is that four words?
This strong and bold brunette didn’t marry her partner (ahem, George Clooney) until she was 36.
What is she known for?
Ms. Clooney is known for being a well-respected international human rights lawyer. She’s had many clients, from the country of Armenia to former Ukranian Prime Minister Yulia Tymoshenko.
Her career is so impressive that we can only imagine how the universe may have challenged her inner-strength and put it to the test!
No doubt she can teach us a lesson in being strong.
Now, she’s married and has two lovely twins, Alexander and Ella.
4. Kaleigh Cuoco
Occupation: Actress, Entrepreneur
Some lessons are best learned the hard way. You’ll never forget them!
That’s just what happened to Kaleigh Cuoco when she married her ex-husband Ryan Sweeting in 2013 when she was around 28.
Of the marriage, Kaleigh said, “My ex-ruined that word for me [marriage]. I married someone the first time who completely changed. The person I ended up with was not the person I originally met.”
On a personal note, my mom always says that it takes a long time to truly get to know someone. Maybe Kaleigh would agree with this statement too.
But, all is not lost for her! She’s highly successful. When she spoke with Cosmo in April, she was the 2nd highest paid actress in the biz. With Sophia Vergara as number 1.
She also owns her own company and wants to be an example for other women.
Just read this excerpt from Cosmo’s April edition:
“I want to be a full-on girl boss. I’ve been in the business so long, and I’ve worked with the best. I don’t let people mess with me. I want to show girls out there that you can be cool, wear yoga clothes, and run your own fucking company. You don’t have to be a guy in a suit. I want this to be a big company. I want to be sitting down a few years from now and have so many projects going. That’s what I’m excited about.”
All is not lost on the love front either. Eventually, she met her perfect guy. And, at 32 is engaged to be married to Karl Cook! Karl is a fellow equestrian who treats his lady like a princess.
What real women have to say about marriage:
From this Brides.com article:
How about the real ladies out there? What do they have to say about waiting until later to get married? Well, let’s find out. According to this Brides.com article. Real women share their thoughts on marrying in their 30s.
I Pursued My Dreams
“I waited to get married for a few reasons. I had gone through a tough failed engagement at the age of 31 that made me reevaluate what I wanted my future to look like. From there, I quickly took the reigns on my career, moving up to a senior level position at one of the world’s leading PR firms. My parents had taught me to be strong and business-minded and to never stop pursuing my dreams for a man. So, I continued pursuing my dreams, and happened to meet the perfect guy along the way. Aside from meeting the man of my dreams, I am glad I waited until my 30s because I feel that I am teaching my daughters a valuable lesson. I was able to accomplish my own dreams, live without any regrets and provide my family with a financially comfortable life because I worked on establishing myself in my career first.” —Lori, married at 38
We Both Became More Secure
“My now-husband and I actually met in our mid-20s. But soon after, I got ‘the call.’ He liked spending time with me, but he wasn’t ready for a relationship. So it ended there. But because we worked in the same career field, we continued to see one another at industry events. This went on for seven years, until we gave it another try, and got married a year later. I’m so glad I waited because when we first started dating, we were both trying to play the part of what we thought the other was looking for. We were 27 and 29, and although we felt mature, we still had a lot of growing up to do — personally, professionally, spiritually. By the time we gave it a second shot, in our mid-30s, we were completely ourselves — secure in our own skin, established in our careers, and with a clear view of what is most important to us.” —Jaime, married at 36
I’m not saying you shouldn’t get married in your 20s. Afterall I know the universe has a unique plan for each one of us. And for some, that means sharing our journey earlier than others.
What I am saying is that for the rest of us. The single girls who want to be in love. Until that time comes, let’s make our lives amazing.
Let’s not settle for less than we deserve. Let’s wait to be chased and pursued and swept off our feet. Just as we should.
What do you think about putting yourself first? What ways will you implement this mentality?